In order to fit in and get our needs met, we learn to reject and betray all the parts of ourselves that those who raise us judge and make bad or wrong. It totally makes sense that we do this, and yet, it is very sad, because it sets up a life-long habit of rejecting, betraying and fracturing ourselves. Shadow integration is the process of owning back all the disowned qualities of ourselves and learning to have an unconditionally loving relationship with not just our “good” qualities (as that would be conditional love and acceptance!) but with our “negative” qualities as well. We are learning to accept and love ALL of ourselves.